Praying

For Vicki and Kerwin Dees and their whole family. I love you guys.

No Title

I don't have much to say, I'm up too late and my mid is wandering. I was one of the lucky people that got to have Stephanie in my life. Six years seems too few to have been able to spend with her, but they were great years. Even the last two as I watched her suffer and fight a terrible disease. Her spirit, drive, and faith taught me so much about life. Every day continues to bring challenges as I struggle with grief and continuing on. I miss Stephanie, but I am glad she never has to worry about pain again. I only hope that I can pass her memory, her faith, her spirit, and her strength on to all those whose paths I cross.

Grace and Peace.

Sometimes

Sometimes I can't help but see the look in your eyes as Janan told you "This might be the end". Sometimes I keep replaying telling you in ICU that I told the doctors not to intubate you, thankfully thats the same time you told me that you loved me for the last time. I Treasure that memory and I Love you too.

The First of Too Many

The first important anniversary milestone has come and passed. Prayers be with Armando's Family. Marathon Pipeline erected this memorial at the jobsite, close to the location of the accident.

Making It

That's exactly what I'm doing day by day and hour by hour. There's nothing else I can do. I apologize for not being better about keeping up with this blog, maybe I will become better, or maybe I will start a different one and allow this one to remain as is. Regardless, I am still here. In Oklahoma for the time being. I haven't made it out to Siloam for church near as much as I would have liked. I miss all the people out there, but part of me is still scared of the memories and emotions that will come up when I'm there.

I have come to deeply appreciate the many joyous memories I have of Stephanie, but there are times when the sense of loss is certainly overwhelming. There are also times when I feel as though nothing has happened. I often think of something Stephanie would enjoy hearing about, and have to remind myself I can't tell her about it.

A great friend sent me a very good book about dealing with loss. The author experienced his own tragic loss and is able to write with and about the real emotions, and the real way in which life moves on.

So I am here and I am making it. With support from everyone in my life, and ultimately with the support from God. I live each day because there is nothing better for me to do. "To live is Christ, to die is gain".

Grace and Peace,

Warner

Stephanie Marie (Owcarz) Bradley

It has been a whirlwind 12 days. At one point my dad and I drove around 2200 miles in a four day period. All of this travel, combined with the normal busyness of the Christmas season has left me somewhat physically drained while leaving me mostly too busy to think. Let me first say that the services for Stephanie were all very beautiful. It was good to see friends and family that it had been a while since I had seen. I only wish it had been under different and better circumstances. Thanks you to everyone that was able to make it and thank you to everyone that wasn't able to make it but sent their thoughts, prayers, and cards and flowers.

I wanted to take some time to recount some memories I have of Stephanie. These will be in no particular order and may take more than one or two posts for me to finish. Please feel free to include your own memories in the comment section.

I remember our wedding day. As the doors in the chapel opened I saw Steph and her dad about to walk in. She was so beautiful. So happy. Her face on that day is one of my favorite memories of her. After our vows and a few pictures we rode to the reception in a 1947 convertible her parents had rented for us. This was a lot of fun as we got lots of honks and plenty of smiles. The reception was also fun, we split up for most of it, but then we didn't know how to cut the cake or toast, Stephanie's mom had to correct us.

I remember our first townhouse together. It was essentially a dump. But it was our home, and we enjoyed our time there. I used to make Stephanie go pay the rent because our dish washer was broken, and the property manager would give her a discount because he always forgot to get it fixed. While we lived here we used to have to bum off of our friends to let Ruekie out because I worked in Tulsa and Stephanie would sometimes have school or work all day in Fayetteville. One morning Stephanie woke me up. She told me the rapture was happening, she had heard the trumpet sound. A few seconds later the "trumpet" sounded again as the train made it's way through Siloam Springs. I teased Stephanie about this until we later learned another friend of ours heard and thought the same thing. Then I teased them both. This is a good illustration of Stephanie in last few hours. She was ready to go. Just as ready as she was that early morning at home.

Stephanie's last days and weeks were tough. When we checked into the hospital after Thanksgiving I was very worried about her. It wasn't until the Wednesday after Thanksgiving, when we got the results from the brain CT that I began to have hope again. As Steph recovered from her hypercalcemia, we were hopeful she would be released soon, we would go to Tulsa, and begin some sort of a clinical trial. Stephanie never lost hope. She never lost faith. She knew she was going to get better, she knew she was going to have a life, and she knew she was going to get to conitnue to decorate our house in Tulsa. On Saturday before Steohanie went home the doctor on call for Dr. B came in with Stephanie's Dr. Heels. They spoke to Stephanie about decisions she should make now in the event she coded. They counseled that in the event of intubating Stephanie she would most likely never have the tube removed. When they left we hugged and cried. Stephanie told me she still wanted her miracle. She wasn't supposed to be having this conversation. She didn't know what to do. On Sunday Dr. Heels again came by and talked to Stephanie some more. Steph still didn't want to discuss anything as you can imagine. Later Sunday I asked Stephanie if we could tell our families what the doctors hed told us the past two days. She said yes, but I had to make sure they knew we were still looking for clinical trials. She wanted everyone to know she still had hope, that she was still planning on getting better. I couldn't bring myself to tell anyone that day. There was a consultation set up for Steph on Monday with the pallative care team of doctors that helps patients make end of life decisions. I decided that after Stephanie made a decision as to whether or not get tubed we could tell everyone everything at once. I still regret not telling our families. Although I feel this is what Stephanie wanted at the time, I wish everyone had been able to be more prepared.
On Monday, December 14th, Stephanie woke up to go to her radiation treatment and was having extreme difficulty breathing. She made it down to radiation, Dr. Fields was walking by and took one look at her and sent her back upstairs because she was in such obvious discomfort. This was my first clue something was possibly very wrong. Dr. Fields does not let people miss their treatments. We got back to the room and Steph's 2 favorite daytime nurses were there. They became immeadiately concerned with the issues Steph was having breathing. They called for the lung specialist to come see her ASAP. He ordered a chest x ray prior to showing up. I was able to see it. Her lungs looked terrible. Her left looked solid and her right looked fuzzy (full of fluid). This scared me. When the doctor came in so did the two nurses. Stephanie was sitting up in a chair and realy laboring to breathe. The doctor explained he wanted to send her to ICU. The nurse stepped in and told Stephanie that this meant she would get a tube in her throat to keep her breathing. Stephanie's eyes got wide and she shook her head that she did not want that to happen. Then the nurse asked her if she knew that this meant it was probably the end. Again her eyes got wide and she shook her head again. They decided to take her to the ICU due to her indecision. When we got to the ICU and they moved her to the bed there they connected her to the BIPAP machine, which forced air into her lungs when she took a breath, no matter how shallow. She was continually becoming more distressed. My mom arrived at some point. The nurses upstairs had called Stephanie's parents for me and they were on the way. The pallative care team doctor and nurse came in at this point as well as the critical care doctor. They began talking to me about whether or not they should intubate Steph. This was a decision I did not want to make. Eventually after remembering all the things that had been told us by all the doctors, and also after thinking long and hard about what Stephanie would want I tol them not to intubate her, and to make her as comfortable as possible. This is the hardest thing I have ever done in my 26years of life. They gave her some medicine and she calmed down finally. Steph's parents arrived and later on so did her brother. Eventually, around 5:00pm Stephanie woke up and was lucid. I am so thankful for this brief time that she was awake and able to communicate. Her first response was to try to pull the BIPAP mask off. Later while we were alone I told her that I had made the decision not to intubate her. She gave me a classic Stephanie look that said "Why?" I told her everything that had weighed in my decision, she closed her eyes and nodded. Then she began working on the BIPAP mask again. I told her that the mask was what was helping her breathe more than anything else and she had to leave it on. She continued acting like she wanted it off. I told her to wait, and I texted her mom for them to come back in. When her parents and brother arrived back in the ICU room she took time to tell us all that she loved us. She told me twice. I think she was assuring me I had made the right decision on the intubation. Then she asked for the mask to come off. A nurse came in and removed it slightly, enough for her to tell us "Let me go! Let me go!" but then she realized she really couldn't breathe with the mask off. We put it back on and asked if she still wanted it off. She shook her hand to indicate she was unsure, so we left the mask on overnight. As a testament to the impact that Stephanie had on people, at about midnight the number of people at the hospital had swelled to include 2 more people from Illinois, 3 people from Little Rock, and several more from Luling. You all know who you are, and your presence was much appreciated. On Tuesday December 15th at just after 5:00pm I asked the nurse to remove the BIPAP mask and place Stephanie on just oxygen. She breathed for approximately 15 to 20 minutes and then she went home to heaven. We wept. We wailed. We grieved. We rejoiced. Stephanie lived in excruciating pain for about 2 months before passing. For a week she was unable to catch her breath. For a month she was barely strong enough to make it around the apartment. She lived a short life. She lived a full life. She met our Lord and Sacior with a grace surpassing any I've witnessed. She was my helper. She was my best friend. I am sad she is gone, I am overjoyed she is no longer suffering.

These are some lyrcis from one of my favorite bands, Stavesacre, the song is "Gold and Silver"
Do I see God in all of this? maybe all along
It's just that we're so small, and simply not as strong
Strong like wings of silver, and feathers made of gold
To carry heavy hearts, to cover all our helpless souls

To cover all of us

Under wings of Gold and Silver sometimes we have to hide
For shelter from this bitter winter at least tonight

This is a poem Paula sent me:
THE WEAVER, by Benjamin Malachi Franklin (1882-1965)

My Life is but a weaving
between my Lord and me;
I cannot choose the colors
He worketh steadily.

Oft times He weaveth sorrow
And I, in foolish pride,
Forget He sees the upper,
And I the under side.

Not til the loom is silent
And the shuttles cease to fly,
Shall God unroll the canvas
And explain the reason why.

The dark threads are as needful
In the Weaver's skillful hand,
As the threads of gold and silver
In the pattern He has planned.

He knows, He loves, He cares,
Nothing this truth can dim.
He gives His very best to those
Who leave the choice with Him.

Grace and Peace

Stephanie's Services

Stephanie's Services will be held at Bible Center Church in Luling, La. Viewing/visitation will be at 9:30am the service will be haeld at 11:00am.
There will also be a graveside service for her at 2pm on Saturday in Auburn, Al.
For the past eight months, while Stephanie has been in and out of the hospital, she has mainly stayed in what is known as 5 west. This is the cancer center in the hospital. During this time we met and grew to be friends with many of the nurses and staff that work there. If you would like to make a donation in Stephanie's memory please make it to the cancer center specifically. Donations can be made at the Our Lady of the Lake Foundation website.

We Have Such a Dim View

Scott Hodge, the man who married us, once told me that we as humans have such a dim view of heaven. Otherwise no one would say something like "I just want to see/do ____ before I die". If we truly understood what heaven was like there is no way we would ever wait for something on this Earth. Tonight just before 6:30 Stephanie was able to find out exactly heaven is like. She lost her battle with cancer, her body had just been through too much. The tumor in her left lung had grown to nearly replace the lung, pain was not subsiding in her arm from the growth in the chest wall, and her right lung was full of fluid. She fought hard, and she fought long, but it was just too much.Today marks eight months from the official diagnosis of her recurrence. Your thoughts and prayers for all of her family and friends is greatly appreciated. I will post the details about the services once they are finalized.

They Ought to Name a Room After Her

...Or maybe an entire wing. Stephanie has been re-admitted to the hospital. She started Radiation on Tuesday and Wednesday. Then on Wednesday night we drove to Waco for Thanksgiving and her grandmother's birthday party. The trip seemed to really wipe Stephanie out, she was in a lot of pain, sleeping most of the time, could barely walk, and was pretty confused. After seeing everyone and enjoying the party on Thursday we packed up and headed back to Gonzales so Stephanie could get her next two treatments on Saturday and Sunday. Sunday evening she started getting even more confused and weaker. When we went to the doctor on Monday he immeadiately suggested the hospital because her calcium was so high. Hypercalcemia is relatively common in people with solid tumors in the lungs, and causes most of the problems she was having. On Tuesday, after recieving some anti calcium drugs she was still pretty loopy, so the doctor decided to scan her brain just in case. The scan was thankfully clear, but it was still a scary few days. Today she is mostly lucid as the effects of the calcium are wearing off finally. Hopefully she will be discharged early next week.

Update: One Month Later

It's been a while since I've updated, even longer than the month it's been since Stephanie did. And what a month it has been. After her last update Steph started complaining about the Taxol and significant numbness in her hands and feet (a common side effect of the chemo). The third week of her three week cycle her blood counts were down and she didn't recieve the Taxol, only the Erbitux and later two units of blood. The next week was an off week, towards the end of the week she began complaining about a sharp pain in her left arm and hand. On Monday when she saw the doctor we discussed this and he determined he would like to scan her and see if there was a reason for her pain. She had treatment that day as well since we were in the bulding. At the end of the week we traveled to O'Fallon IL to visit my family, surprise my sister as she was in a play, and celebrate my mom's 56th birthday. Unfortunately there was a reason for the pain that showed up on the scan. The Taxol/Erbitux combination was not being effective and the large tumor in her left lung (the only one that showed any activity a month before) was growing somewhat significantly. It has begun eroding the chest wall and is pressing on nerves in the let shoulder blade area, which is causing the pain in the arm and hand. He switched her to another new drug to see if it would be effective. She felt good in the beginning of the week, but again towards the end the pain became unbearable. When we saw the medical oncologist on Monday and told him about the pain he suggested we consult with the radiation oncologist and determine if the tumor could be radiated to more quickly relieve the pain in the shoulder. The RO decided that he could and Stephanie started her second round of radiation on Tuesday before Thanksgiving. She recieved two treatments before Thanksgiving and then we headed out to Texas for Stephanie's grandmother's 80th birthday. It was good to see her extended family and celebrate such a long life. Stephanie was of course the second center of attention at the party. Unfortunately all the traveling has pretty well done her in. She slept the entire day Thursday, except while we were actually at the party. We had to return to Gonzales on Friday so she could receive her next two radiation treatments today and tomorrow. She has slept all day today as well, she even missed the Razorback game and slept through all my hollering. Hopefully tomorrow she will get some energy back.

We are still planning on moving back to Tulsa. The date is currently set for traveling on December 18th, and staying in our house for Christmas. The MO is researching cancer centers for us and will make a recommendation, probably sending Stephanie to an academic center in order to participate in a clinical trial.

Grace and Peace

Can't A Girl Just Get One Step Ahead?

Can't I just have a normal life for a day? I mean seriously I'd settle or an hour if that would be possible. On the 19th (Monday - when I had my treatment I was feeling pretty good, tired though. So I had my chemo, and got that shot to boost my red blood cell count again - yeh the one that hurts unless they push it in fast enough and not all of them do that. Everything was all hunky - dory. Well, at some point during the afternoon I did something to the mid - left section of my back and as the night went on it got worse and worse. Yesterday I barely got out of bed and it was killing me to even breathe because of the pain. Today was a little better, but not as much mostly kicking me in the - it just . I can drink a few small sips at a time - like 2 - and I haven't even attempted to eat so we are using the feeling tube. I've mainly been sleeping the day away with the drugs. Does anyone have any back /injury fixes?

Okay, so I wrote that over period of a few days and I'm getting a little better I think. I'm drinking more by mouth now and I think that is from the antibiotics because I coughed up some nasty nasty stuff that had been stuck in my throat. We still don't have a date in December for when we are moving back. Things are just always changing out there - so we are still just playing it by ear! Okay, I'm stopping now, before I make even less sense than I have been.

Have You Forgotten About Me Yet?

Long time no post! Well, I guess it's been a week or two, which isn't toooo bad. I finally have some news to post about - see, good things Last week I had the week off from chemo and had my PET/CT scan. It was definitely nice not having to get up early for chemo on Monday. Today we got the scan results and they were definitely positive. The only scans he had readily available to compare them with were the scans from April and I've had several other scans since then during my hospital stays.

So, the scan results:

There were originally two main tumors, one in each lung. The one in the right lung is near the middle of my chest. The tumor in my left lung (where they originally took the biopsy) is near the outside wall of my lung.

According to the scans from last week my tumor in my right lung is not there anymore. The tumor in my left lung is still similar in size (compared to April) but it is responding to the chemo. It's hard to explain. The tumor area is about the same size but the active part of the tumor that is lit up on the PET scan is smaller.

So. My Oncologist thinks it's the Erbitux that is having such a good response so we are continuing with it. I am stopping the Cisplatin and starting Taxol - which means I think I may end up losing my hair again, but I haven't read up enough on Taxol to know for sure.

Well, this is all the updating I'm going to do tonight - I think I've fallen asleep 7 or 8 times while writing this - Warner keeps poking me to wake me up. Goodnight!

Somebody Listen To Me!

Story Time!

So, my parents and brother came up to the apartment yesterday to visit for a little while. Well, I was feeling kind of run down all day so I hadn't eaten really at all so I decided to make some cheese toast because it usually goes down well. Well, rewind to Saturday night - per Warner's request - I made an apple cake from a recipe on The Pioneer Woman (it was actually a really good cake). Well, you cook the apples in a skillet and pop it in the oven once you put on the cake mix. The problem is that there is twenty pounds of butter in the recipe and apparently during the entire cooking time, butter had been dripping over the sides of the skillet on to the oven floor - which I noticed when I took the cake out but there wasn't anything I could do at that time while the oven was still hot. Okay, back to Sunday night and my cheese toast. I forgot all about the butter being in the bottom of the oven so I turned the oven on 400 and popped my toast in there (I'm not one to preheat the oven unless I'm baking bread or a cake or something like that). Well, the whole time it was cooking I was thinking it smelled like something was smoking or whatever - it wasn't too strong though so I ignored it. Well, I went to get my bread out and when I opened the door there was a small fire on the bottom of my oven - to which I exclaimed - "There is a fire in the bottom of my oven." AND NOBODY MOVED OR DID ANYTHING. My dad had been standing right next to me and he just walked away and sat on the couch. Then I said, "Umm...Warner there's a fire..." Nothing...then I slightly yelled "Somebody listen to me! The oven is on fire." And then my dad and Warner responded and dad blew out the fire and my mom and brother stared at me like I was crazy. Apparently I didn't have enough of a reaction to the fire for anyone to think anything of it. Maybe I'll just have to be overly-dramatic next time.

Fatigue At It's Finest

For the past week I have been fighting some extreme fatigue - which can always be quite entertaining since there is no telling what I will say or do - I can' recall any funny stories right now, but I know we've had our share the past few days. On Monday night I was running a high fever (101.8-102.3) so we called MBP because that's what you do at times like that. The on-call doctor wrote me a prescription for some antibiotics - because that is usually the problem, and it was - my tube that is still in my belly was all red a super painful and draining some. So, we got that fixed. On Tuesday I was still feeling pretty blah, just run down and out of it and I threw up once, so I had Warner take me in to MBP for some IV fluids and meds and whatever other magic potions they wanted to throw my way. Well, I didn't get any magic potions, instead I was the proud recipient of two bags of blood. Turns out I was quite anemic. So, I spent my day getting my transfusion. The transfusion did help for a while, I felt really good Tuesday and even on Wednesday. The problem, though, was that I was on the antibiotics and I'm also on blood thinner. Apparently the antibiotics can increase the effects of the blood thinner, and I'm guessing this is why I'm back to feeling run down. I do not have anymore antibiotics to take and I go into the doctor on Monday, so hopefully my body will work on straightening itself back out in the mean time.

Here are a few pictures from the house in Tulsa - we painted the study and the kitchen while we were there over Labor Day.

The kitchen nook area.

The wall on the right needs some art work or something to fill the space. We got the plates above the windows from Hobby Lobby and I'm debating about going and buying the larger one but I'm really not sure what to do....

The study

And again

New artwork above the fireplace. One of our Washington pictures.

My stomach with the tubes still in but my bruises from the Lovanox shots were mostly gone at this point.

Oh well, I'm going to head off to bed here soon! Goodnight!

There's a Hole In My Belly Dear Warner, Dear Warner

So, today I got my drainage tube taken out. You would think this would be no big deal because I had my PEG tube taken out last year and it was a piece of cake. Well, except for the whole confusion in the pre-op area and no one being able to find me, and yeah, no big deal. Well, turns out they put in a different type of tube this time - one with a non-deflatable stopper in it. NON-DEFLATABLE. Last time, my PEG tube had a balloon on the end of it and the radiologist just deflated the balloon and slipped the tube out. Then he butterflied the hole with tape and threw some gauze on there and we called it a day. This time, after waiting in the waiting room for an hour and a half (they were super behind) I went back to the room only to find out that the G tube had the mushroom stopper on the end of it and that was going to be pulled through the hole in my belly - I wanted to start crying right at that moment, but I didn't. Then he pulled the tube out and let's just say I screamed some and then my eyes got quite watery. Warner's hand is probably broken in about 20 different places as well. So, he pulled the tube out in two yanks, yeah, not one, but two, and stomach content went everywhere. I soaked through tons of gauze in about two seconds. My tshirt and jeans did a good job of soaking up the stomach stuff as well. I'm still leaking a good bit tonight so I've got a stack of towels and gauze nearby and Dr. Warner is doing a great job by keeping me doped up on some pain meds for now.

My stomach can close up by tomorrow (like it did last time) but there's always a chance that it may take a few days and I'm definitely going to be more sore this time than I was last time, just because of how they pulled the tube. And you know what the worst part is??? I still have my feeding tube in the right side of my stomach so I have to go through all this again eventually. I think I might be waiting a little while though.

Not Much Is Going On Around Here

I am usually one of the first people in the chemo room on treatment days. We always scheduled treatments for as early as we could because it used to take all day and we just kept it that way. For the first couple of hours Warner and I both get to sit in recliners because the room takes a while to fill up, but eventually Warner has to move to a roll-y chair that the nurses move around and also use so he occasionally gets bumped from his chair temporarily. No big deal really. Well, there is one nurse who is kind of loud and she embarrassed the heck out of Warner yesterday by yelling to him from across the completely full room (she needed his chair),

Nurse: Mr. Bradley, I need your chair

Warner: Okay

Nurse: Sorry I would have called you by your first name, you're too young to be Mr. Bradley. What's your first name?

Warner: It's Warner

Nurse: Warren?

Warner: no, Warner

Nurse: Okay, Warner I need your chair.

EVERYONE was staring at him and he turned slightly red. Way to not draw attention to us! So now everyone knows who we are, although we already stand out in there because we are so young. I thought we had always done a good job of flying under the radar, but the first week I walked into chemo after Washington, I was amazed at all the people who commented and mentioned they had been praying for me and such.

So, in other news I have switched from daily Lovanox shots to taking Coumadin and my stomach is thankful. I'll have to post a picture of my stomach - it was dark dark purple and probably the worst bruise I have ever seen. I'm also getting my stomach tube out sometime soon - I'm waiting to hear when the appointment will be. I'll still have the feeding tube but that one is bearable - it's the drainage tube that gives me problems and I'm not using it any more so it just hurts all the time - so it is time for it to go. Well, that's all I've got for now.

Growing Back Muscles Is Hard Work

I have been a terrible blogger lately but the truth is, apart from telling you that everything is going great, I've got nothing to say! Or at least, I don't find most of it interesting, maybe you all would disagree, so here you go.

We have finally gotten a step ahead of all the nausea and dehydration (this past week at chemo I didn't even need extra fluids) and I have had really good weeks since getting back from Washington, granted, any week that I don't go to the hospital is a good week! I have gained a significant amount of weight in the past two weeks - I'm up from 115 to around 130, but I'm still wearing a size 4 or 6 in pants which means I have been shopping a few times! My plan is to get my weight around 140 and keep it there, so we will see how that goes. I have stopped using the stomach drainage tube (I still have it, it's just closed) and I guess as long as things keep going well with that I'll get it out eventually. I still use the feeding pump. but it now just runs through the night and in the morning, which means I get to unhook from it all afternoon. Since I started gaining weight so quickly after Washington, because I am eating more by mouth, we do less food by the feeding tube. We couldn't do this before when I had the drain tube open because everything I would eat and drink would just come out through there and basically I relied completely on the feeding pump. The IV pole can also be a pain to push around so it's really nice to have some freedom from it for a little while each day once my pump is done - it's much easier to go shopping without it.

So I have been eating about three meals a day by mouth - I still can't eat a whole lot at a time, but I do snack a lot in between meals. Hopefully I'll be completely independent of all my tubes here soon and they can come out! I've been cooking a good bit as well - something I've missed doing! I even bought a cute little apron from World Market the other day. I also bought a ton of new cake decorating supplies from Hobby Lobby yesterday and I can't wait to try them all out!

I always joke with Warner that growing back all my muscles is really hard work. Because I'm feeling so well, I'm usually super exhausted by the end of the day and since my muscles didn't get used for so long, they have been super sore lately! Especially my legs!! But I'm slowly getting more endurance and getting around better. Well, that's all the updating I have for now - I think I've rambled on long enough. I'll try to keep up with this thing more often now!

Oh! If you need Haley's address sent to you so you can send her your bracelet money, email me - sobradley@gmail.com , or leave your email address in the comment section so I know where to email it to.

Just A Quick Note

My awesome friend Haley has mailed out the bracelets that she has finished so be watching your mailboxes. If you have not sent her the money for them, they are ten dollars each and I can get you her mailing address or you can send me the money and I will get it to her. I will post an update about us at some point in the near future - maybe even with pictures!! I know you guys miss me terribly, right?

A Much Needed Break!

Here are a few pictures from where we've been lately! Now you'll understand why we've been MIA from the blog. I'll post more pictures and stories later on. Enjoy these for now.

The view on top of Hurricane Ridge in Olympic National Park - it was awesome!

On top of Hurricane Ridge

The Hoh Rainforest - they were experiencing a drought while we were there!

This is "sunset" at Rialto Beach - it was quite foggy!

Rialto Beach

Dungeness Spit! It was pretty neat out there.

This is at the Lavender Farms - definitely one of our favorite parts of the trip.

There were so many flowers out there and the lavender smelled soooo good!

There were fields and fields of lavender!

This is at the Dockside Grill at the John Wayne Marina where we ate for our anniversary dinner. The food was okay but it lacked the cajun spices!

The made a really good seafood bisque though.

Crescent Lake - the water was absolutely gorgeous!

Crescent Lake

Crescent Lake

The sunset over Hurricane Ridge.

The view from Hurricane Ridge

The sun set at like 9:00 so it was a late night for us.

The Seattle skyline from the space needle where we ate lunch before our flight on Saturday

Yep we ate lunch at the top of that thing! It spins around while you eat so you get to see the entire view of the city.

The moon over Seattle

Sunset over Seattle - we were surprised by how nice of a city Seattle is.

A Bug In My Arm

Last week it took them nine IV sticks to get a vein that would work for my chemo. And the vein they got was really tiny so they had to pump everything slowly. This week, they stopped sticking me after 3 tries. So I caved in and finally agreed to get a port in my arm I had already tried to have a PICC line placed but that didn't work and I've had two central lines on separate occasions while in the hospital but both times they had to come out before I left because of the risk of infection since they were only temporary. So, apparently it's about the size of a quarter and it right under my skin in the inside of my upper left arm. They didn't put my under for it, just gave me Versed and Fentanyl, but they couldn't give me very much because my blood pressure was ridiculously low, like 80s/50s. After I got the port I went and got my chemo. It was much quicker, that's for sure - no more searching for veins or burning veins from some meds.

So, today is the day after chemo and I'm feeling good as usual. Tomorrow is usually when the fun kicks in. I'm just staying on top of my meds and all that for now and really hoping for a good week!

We leave for WASHINGTON STATE on MONDAY! Yay vacation. I'm really really excited! I'll write more later!